Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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