she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
