dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
