we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
