Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Alive.
So much puke
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
