Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
