Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
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