no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
