I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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