Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
