is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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