I want to stick my p in your. b.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize
