How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
