You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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