Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
please come you make the beer taste better
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
