Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
