Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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