last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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