idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
ttyl tear gas
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
how drunk are you?
Several
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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