He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
