Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
