Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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