fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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