So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Randomize
