you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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