Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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