in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Everyone says I win the strip club
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
