jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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