to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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