i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
