Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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