Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
