Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
