you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
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