you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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