Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize
