ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize