yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
soo... how was my night?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize