I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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