wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
