i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize