i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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