I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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