I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
