i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
