are you still at the devil's house?
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
