people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Randomize
