I smell stomach acid.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Mom said you looked used
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
