You're so nebulous sometimes
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Randomize
