Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Randomize
